August 9, 2008

From: Gary West
Sent: Saturday, August 09, 2008 10:55 PM
Subject: First Something

Funny how many notebooks look alike.

Billions of pages forming Millions of notebooks, how many just alike?

I picked one up and shoved it in my case unknowingly.

Later I opened it to work........sketches of camps, beach homes, ideas,
schemes, plans, shooting houses sketches....they were there first...

Lines on paper, old scribble, a doodle here, a doodle there, like
ancient art, primitive carefree.

Like drawings on a cave wall. No perfect rhyme or reason except to me.
The lines are mine. The evolution of my sketches can be seen in many
notebooks over the years.

They represent something so familiar and yet so foreign at the same
time. They are like a snap shot of a reflection in a pool before the
pool dried up.

They represent plans for dwellings that we could all share. I could see
the heavy timber frame hammer beam trusses. The Tennessee dry stacked
stone fireplace. The glass over looking the water. The wrap around bar
that allowed me to cook and serve a small army all while being able to
see them and talk...share.

I could see the decorator colors of the camp, deep red, green, and gold.
The colors of Christmas and fall. The camo bedding in the bunk room for
the grandchildren (to come).

The beaded wood ceiling. The cypress 6 panel doors stained different
colors to designate the red room the green room...

The stained concrete floors, saw cut and printed with wildlife patterns.
The heads of game and the bookshelves full of books.

Those are the things I can see in the sketches, the doodle, the scribble,
the ugly notes.

I can visualize the camp like I am there. I can see the water, the
colors, the fall leaves, the ducks landing. I can smell the oak burning.
I can feel the approach of a cold front.

I can see in my mind the seasons change as we move from staying at the
camp to the gulf.
The earth going green to red, red to gold and then the grey of winter.
Spring buds light green and then we begin again.

I can smell the grill and the food. I can hear the vehicles pull in. The
music, the voices, the laughter.

I can see the little ones jump out with the adventure of life all over
them.

I can feel the heat of the fireplace in winter and the cool of the water
in summer.

I can see the firsts.

The first deer, bass, squirrel, brim, snapper, rifle shot, bow shot, and
popping bug.

The first time to skin a deer, or clean a fish.

I loved my dreams, I wanted to finish what I have been dreaming about
for years.

I wanted the space, the individual privacy and the togetherness all in
one design.

I worked on it over and over and over. Justin looked at my drawings when
I put them on AutoCAD. He stood behind me just like Allen did and would
just say awesome. That was his word. I wanted something big enough to
never leave anyone out. I showed him his room, the guest room, the great
den, the kitchen.

This was within the last two weeks of his time with us.

I now sit and slowly close the notebook. The sketches are not valuable
anymore. They have served the purpose. They are a vanishing reflection
of a previous image.

My hearts desire was to have my family expand, grow and grow.

I wanted to just relax and enjoy them, serve them, teach them, and love
them.

I think about my ability to sketch and build for mine and then I am
reminded of Jesus when He said "I go to prepare a place for you"

I am set back but He is not. He is preparing a place that I cannot
imagine.

Allen and Justin looked over my shoulder, they know how I saw the
future.

I wish I could look over theirs now, to see the real future.

To see the "first something" the Lord is showing them in my stead.

Lord,
Thanks for the ability to dream, now I dream of heaven. My heart skips
when I think of it and I feel your Spirit confirm that you are waiting
on me.
Waiting to show me some "first somethings".
Gary